My Simple Beauty: The Law of Chastity... REAL Talk!

Tonight I had the privilege of studying with what is becoming one of my most favorite families. Tonight's topic, drum roll please,................... "The Law Chastity." First off what a difficult topic to discuss period! Two, what a difficult topic to discuss with young adults! Third, how is it not more difficult to talk to two young adults of both genders. Now that we have got that out of the way lets list the five laws of chastity.

Adultery.
Impure thoughts.
Homosexuality
Modesty
Being pure prior to marriage.

I think all are self explanatory and I am not going to use this particular post as a lesson but as a testimony. I will however list biblical references at the end of this post and encourage you to have a read and prayer.

Disclaimer: This is my personal experience and testimony. This is not meant to offend anyone or for judgement to be cast. It my real life story I am choosing to share with the world in order to testify that the gospel is true.

As a convert to the church I grew up in the "American" society of what was acceptable, popular, what as a teenager I thought was sooooo cool! Boy was I wrong! I made the ultimate poor decision to give my virtue prior to marriage as a teenager. Why you ask? Well to start I was in a "serious," and I say that very loosely, relationship. As most teenage girls are today, and I imagine it has only worse, was pressured like you would not believe.... Not only by my said boyfriend but my girlfriends! Everyone was doing it! Like most girls I thought at a very young age, he was it. The man of my dreams. We were going to be married SOMEDAY so, why wait? Give him what he wants! Well I am here to tell you that little fairy-tale was far from reality.

I, again as a teenager entered into another "serious" relationship. This relationship ultimately became my first marriage. It started the same way ultimately having premarital relations. We eventually moved into together. AND you guessed it, I ended up pregnant! I was devastated. I thought I ruined my life at the young age of twenty. My family was so angry and they thought I ruined my life. I was angry. I refused to accept it and it took a long time to come around to the idea of becoming a mother. Yes, Madalyn was born out of wedlock. Now ultimately he felt he had to do the right thing. My family was saying I needed to do the right thing and we were married six months after my beautiful Madalyn was born. Now I say beautiful because she is the only thing good from this situation. At the time I thought I loved this man and I think there were times I did. We were two completely different people with two completely different sets of ideals that had not had a child this world would have fizzled out. As you guessed it after four years of active marriage and one year of separation we were DIVORCED!!! With one very young one year old daughter.

Now sit back and think about it. Every child wants to know the story of how they came into this world and we has parents want to tell them. "it was so special the day I found out we were having a baby." They don't want to hear that their mother through a complete fit. Shoved he father and screamed out how he ruined her life. Ultimately we, meaning Madalyn and I, have persevered.

For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.

Ephesians 5:5

My decisions to break the Law of Chastity is something I will have to live with for the rest of my life. Bringing and innocent child into this world and ripping her life apart through divorce is something I will have to live with the rest of my life. Madalyn was never my punishment. She was my blessing. My consequence is that I get to look at her everyday knowing that I am the reason she comes from a broken home. Because of my bad decisions two of my children will always have two separate homes to live in. They will always feel divided and deep within my heart that is because of my poor choices. It is because I choose not to live within the laws of the Gospel. I love my daughters with all my heart and soul and ache for them everyday that they have two parents who never see eye to eye. Because they have seen their father date countless women. Bond with these women's children only to not be allowed to ever see them again.

Did I learn, NO I did not. I was seeker attention of men to help the loneliness of being a single mother go away.... I was a serial dater with never any intent on settling down. That was of course until I met the man whom I truly love and married because I wanted too and I wasn't pleasing anyone but him and me. What was I left with before I met my husband. Shame. Loneliness. Emptiness. A complete disgrace and lack respect for myself. I showed the world I was completely insecure.

I can only urge people of the next generation and my children s generation to save themselves and live pure. In the end a great happiness will get to be experienced that not many today have the privilege to say they have experienced. What I can say I am grateful for is I now have the gospel to share with my daughters so they can walk down a better path in life then I did and experience true happiness.....

In the name of Jesus Christ - Amen

Love -N

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